Weeks away from graduation, this student was living in a car outside her university

Jasmine, 30, from North Shields was just weeks away from completing a degree in art and design when she became homeless and was forced to live in her car until she found Nightstop. This is her story.

I graduated with a degree in art and design this summer and started my freelance, digital marketing business shortly after leaving University. It’s going OK but really I’m just trying to build my portfolio in social media management and photography. I’d like to specialise in fashion and retail. 

When people look at me, I think they’d find it really hard to believe that I was homeless earlier this year and living out of my car. I’ll never forget that time. Weeks before I had to submit my final papers, following three years of studying, I parked my car just outside Newcastle City Centre in my university car park. No one noticed me. It was exam season and everyone was busy, rushing in and out of college with their own worries about coursework, or exams. Looking back now, I honestly can’t believe how I got through it, and actually managed to finish my course on so little sleep, so little food. At the time, I was working part-time, around 20 hours a week, studying for my finals, and had just been diagnosed with autism, but at no point was I ever going to miss those exams, I’d worked too hard to get to this point.

I tried to act normal in class, but after a few days my tutor noticed I was struggling. They told me I looked pale and exhausted and asked me if it was OK. I knew I couldn’t put on a facade any longer. I couldn’t pretend that I was doing OK, but I didn’t want people at university to know I was struggling. I was embarrassed and I was ashamed to admit that I had nowhere to go, nowhere to live. 

I never expected to end up homeless, but after an argument with a family member, I had to leave and had nowhere to go. I went to a friend’s house, but she is a single mum with not much space and I really didn’t want to be a burden to her and the kids. The only place I could go after that was my car, so that’s where I went. 

I felt crushed and defeated when I was turned away by the council after reaching out to them for help. They couldn’t find me a safe place to stay for the night. After five nights and five days living out of my car I knew I needed help. I slept in car for nearly a week and had to spend my tight student budget on basic survival things like a blanket, bottled water, wet wipes and a glass so I could brush my teeth. I was at breaking point before I reached out to the charity Depaul, who told me about their Nightstop service. I didn’t try them earlier because I didn’t think they’d be able to help me as I am that bit older, but I needed to find out, so I gave them a call.

My first point of call was a lady called Anna, a Nightstop coordinator based in Newcastle. I was totally blown away by how helpful, understanding, and practical she was. She invited me into the Nightstop office five minutes after speaking on the phone. When I arrived, I was invited to sit in the communal space and was told I could hang out for the day. It was really nice and quiet so I got out my laptop and did some of my Uni work. In the background, Anna was working away and found  a couple, just ten minutes up the road from where we were, to host me that very evening. 

I was so anxious about turning up at their house because I had a car boot full of dirty clothes and stuff, I didn’t want them to judge me for it. My autism means I thrive on routines. I’m clean, tidy and like my things to be in order – but that wasn’t possible as I was going from one bad situation to the next. 

My anxiety lifted as soon as Mark, the volunteer host, opened the door.  I said I am here from Nightstop, and he smiled, and invited me in. He showed me my room and the bathroom straight away. I felt safe and relaxed instantly. It felt so peaceful and calm here compared to the busy city centre I’d been parked up in. 

I was hungry, but my anxiety levels were high, so I didn’t join the couple for dinner, and had a crisp sandwich later that evening instead. I saw their stew leftovers on the stove, and when I mentioned to Mark and Elizabeth how lovely it looked, they kindly shared the recipe with me. I still have it, and it’s one of my staple dinners which I now eat it all the time.  

When I left my host’s house, I felt like nothing I could do would be good enough to thank them. I know they can’t accept anything for letting me stay, but I wish I could have given them something, because I was so grateful. Being such an independent person, I struggle when it comes to asking and accepting help, which was what they gave me so freely, no strings attached. They really are wonderful people. 

My living situation is more settled now, I’ve sorted something out. But I often think about what life will look like in the future, but one thing is for sure – if I’m ever in a situation where I have a spare room to offer someone for the night, I’ll be sure to sign up as a Nightstop host myself because I can’t explain the impact it had on my life and could have on someone else’s.” 

To support Depaul UK and find out more about Nightstop please visit www.depaul.org.uk/appeal

This article is by “Jasmine”, a pseudonym.