Communication failures at heart of many difficulties in marriages

The most prevalent problem cited by couples experiencing difficulties in their relationships relate to communication (60 per cent) followed by anxiety and stress (58 per cent), according to according to new figures published on St Valentine’s Day by Accord, the Catholic marriage care agency in Ireland, writes Sarah Mac Donald.

Friction over internet or social media use (19 per cent) and text­ing (22 per cent) were identified by an increasing number of couples as contributing to their difficulties, up from 17 per cent and 21 per cent last year.

The number of people attending the  sacramental marriage preparation course with Accord  rose again last year. A total of 17,108 people attended in 2016, up 8.5 per cent from 15,774 in 2015. The figures cover all of Ireland. The figure is down from a peak of 20,457 in 2008, after which the number plummeted to 13,963 in 2010. The new figures also show Accord dealt with 5,523 counselling cases last year.

The improved economic picture in Ireland is reflected in the slight fall in the number of couples identifying financial problems as an issue in their relationship, 37 per cent as opposed to 38 per cent in 2016.

Bishop Denis Nulty, president of Accord, said that as part of the preparation for the World Meeting of Families, Accord is to review its preparation programme in light of Pope Francis’ apostolic exhortation on the family, Amoris Laetitia. Referring to the “huge damage” technology can have on relationships, Dr Nulty said that, in the past, texts, tweets, Snapchat [etc] were not even considerations in counselling. “Today they contribute hugely to the fractured narrative in many sessions,” he said.