I was lying on the floor inspecting an electrical socket when I noticed quite a few crumbs and seeds lying around. This would be because I have been eating a fair amount of toast over the past few weeks, not 100 per cent of it apparently delivered safely into the Howse maw. A lack of hoovering is also in evidence.

For the toast, the bread had been Hovis Seed Sensation. In eating it, I hadn’t been aware of much of a sensation any different from ordinary toastly feelings. It is true that surveying the crumbs produced a mild sensation of annoyance.

While I was down there, I began gathering crumbs between finger and thumb and depositing them on the cover of a book that happened to be sharing the floor space. Some of the sensational seeds rolled off again, though after I’d removed 20 or 30 crumbs that region of the carpet was looking not only spick but also span.