The role models Gareth Southgate is looking for

St Joseph and the Good Samaritan provide practical examples of Christian virtue that all men can seek to imitate in the circumstances of their own lives.

Last night, Gareth Southgate gave the Richard Dimbleby Lecture in which he talked about a crisis in masculinity and the lack of male role models. The purpose of this article is not to suggest that he is either right or wrong, still less to analyse the causes of the loss of male role models if he is correct. Rather, it is to provide an indication of where we might find male role models outside the places that are often suggested in the modern age.

There is, no doubt, a problem. Around one quarter of children will grow up without a father at home. Families are much smaller and more geographically dispersed, so the extended family does not step in as it used to. There has been an increase in migration which often leads to the splitting up of families, at least temporarily. These challenges will never be solved completely. There will always be difficulties and brokenness in the world. And there are certainly good external role models to whom young males can look outside their families. An increasing number of footballers, for example, live exemplary lives today: you might notice how, when interviewed, modern footballers are often humble and appreciative of the support of others as well as being highly disciplined in their professional life.

But there is a source of role models which seems to have been lost. Until the not-too-recent past, it would have been second nature for people to look to the Bible and the saints for male role models. Whatever your situation in life, you can do that. The saints and the characters in the Bible often have the advantage of living exemplary lives whilst also being flawed in certain ways. This contrast is important in understanding the virtues and the realities of human life, as well as providing reassurance and encouragement to those who may lack self-esteem.

It happens that Gareth Southgate was giving his lecture on the Feast of St Joseph. He missed an opportunity to mention that – this was a big omission!

The life of St Joseph, husband of Mary and foster-father of Jesus Christ, provides a practical example of Christian virtue that all men can seek to imitate in the circumstances of their own lives.

Through a succession of General Audiences between November 2021 and February 2022, Pope Francis offered Catechesis on Saint Joseph. Pope Francis drew particular attention to the witness of the cardinal virtues (fortitude, justice, temperance and prudence) in the life of St Joseph. Although these are not exclusively male virtues, their particular manifestation in the example of Joseph can give a clear and compelling guide to men of all ages today.

St Joseph demonstrates courage through his trust in God and his loving care for his wife and son in the face of tremendous adversity. In the flight into Egypt, St Joseph leads Mary and Jesus on a long and dangerous journey into a foreign land, protecting his son from the murderous persecution of King Herod. We have two examples here – one to avoid and one to imitate. While Herod lashes out with violence fearing loss of power, St Joseph cares for his loved ones. As Pope Francis describes, Joseph “reacts to fear with courage in God’s Providence”. 

St Joseph is a man of justice, who seeks to be in right relationship with God and those around him. He responds, in love, to the sudden discovery that Mary has become pregnant while betrothed. Love, in a mature sense, means the willingness to sacrifice one’s more selfish hopes and dreams to more generously love and serve the good of others – that is what St Joseph did.

St Joseph is also a man of temperance who embraces the need for silence so that he can better hear and respond to the Word of God. Rather than surrendering to mute passivity or surrounding himself with superficial noise, St Joseph creates space for listening to God so he can then act wisely. As Pope Francis highlights “with his silence, Joseph invites us to leave room for the Presence of the Word made flesh, for Jesus”. In the image of St Joseph, Christian men are called to be contemplative as well as active, to listen as well as to speak and move. 

The people’s priests

Shoot-out

The Good Samaritan is a different type of role model. To begin with, he is a fictional figure in a parable, unlike St Joseph. Jesus created the character to express the virtues. The Good Samaritan is a central figure in Pope Benedict’s encyclical, Deus Caritas Est, as well as in Pope Francis’ Fratelli Tutti.

The Good Samaritan is, perhaps, an especially good role model for single males. It would appear that he intended to be away from home for a considerable period of time – though many married males may be away from home too. But he took risks that it might be imprudent for a married man with children to take. Single men are freer in that respect. He was travelling a long distance down a notoriously unsafe road and stopped to help a stranger, thus putting himself in greater danger. He was brave; he had courage. He did not apply the virtue of courage in the pursuit of senseless violence or warfare, but to help a stranger in need. He had prudently accumulated some money out of which he could generously provide for the person who had been robbed. And he spent time with the person and made sure he was cared for. As Pope Francis states in Fratelli Tutti, each day we have decisions to make as to whether to help those in need or be an indifferent bystander: the Good Samaritan shows us how to respond.

The Good Samaritan was also trusting, and the inn keeper was too. Sometimes trusting a stranger is reckless, but having the courage to trust can also help build mutual confidence and social capital instead of disharmony – populism of the left and right feeds on mistrust. To trust somebody can take courage, including accepting the risk that you might be hurt or disappointed.

Referencing his own experiences, Gareth Southgate said that the UK needed to do more to encourage young people – especially young men – to make the right choices in life and not to fear failure. Neither St Joseph nor the Good Samaritan feared failure. He also said that social media influencers “willingly trick young men into believing that success is measured by money or dominance, that strength means never showing emotion, and that the world, including women, is against them”. How different that is from the loving example of St Joseph and the Good Samaritan.

There is, of course, an urgent need to spread the Gospel. But the cardinal virtues can be, and should be, practised by all. The cardinal virtues of fortitude, justice and temperance are underpinned by the virtue of prudence. This is the virtue which can help us understand how to apply the lessons of these two figures in our own lives – and we should start by doing so in very ordinary ways.

Philip Booth is Professor of Finance, Public Policy and Ethics at St Mary’s University, Twickenham.

Naoise Grenham is Policy and Research Analyst at the Bishop’s Conference, but writes in a personal capacity.