Claiming our worth and journeying towards equality on International Women’s Day

When women speak about their journeys, their stories often reveal the power of persistence and hope, highlighting the resilience they demonstrate to overcome societal barriers.

International Women’s Day on 8 March is a time to honour women’s lives, rights and achievements and reflect on our ongoing journey toward true equality.

Empowerment, for many women, unfolds as a steady process of survival, growth and self-discovery rather than a single moment of triumph. My personal story – one among many – underscores how the pursuit of gender equality is deeply personal and far from complete.

I celebrate International Women’s Day not because I have won prestigious awards or reached extraordinary heights, but because I have learned to understand my worth, identity and dignity. I am a woman, and I am educated. That education, however, was not easily earned.

In my childhood, education was scarce. My father was the sole breadwinner of our family and had the responsibility of feeding and educating three children. Opportunities were limited, and dreams often had to compete with the daily struggle for survival and the needs of the family, which made it difficult for many children, including myself, to pursue our aspirations and access quality education. Yet education became my pathway to independence, dignity and self-confidence.

Growing up, I was timid, naïve and often bullied. For a long time, I lived within a comfortable but fragile bubble, unsure of my place in the world. Life, however, has a way of pushing us beyond our comfort zones. When that happened, I realised that moments of rejection and doubt often give birth to resilience, as we hope for better in life amidst daunting challenges.

There were many such moments. I remember failing in thirteen job interviews in the capital city. I remember a man telling me bluntly that I would never get a job anywhere in India. I recall being called a fool because of someone else’s mistake. I reminisce about the disappointment of being rejected by an esteemed university in Delhi because I chose to study the work of Bama Faustina Soosairaj, the renowned Tamil Dalit feminist, teacher and novelist, specifically her groundbreaking book Karukku (1992), for my doctoral research.

Sometimes opportunities were lost due to a lack of connections or recommendations. In a world that rewards influence, being unknown can feel like an invisible barrier.

Did these experiences hurt? Of course they did. There were moments when I wept. Yet I do not see tears as a sign of weakness. Sometimes crying is a way of refusing to surrender to failure. It is a way of gathering strength to try again.

Many people told me I did not know enough. When I was 17, I was asked to cook for 60 people even though I did not know how to make a cup of coffee. Within a year, I learned and excelled in cooking. In other areas of life, too, I faced fears – stage fright, hesitation, and the challenge of speaking confidently in English. Over time, I confronted these barriers and eventually earned a doctoral degree in English literature.

Every woman deserves the opportunity to tell her story and chart her life, career and future. A woman’s narrative may not resemble the narratives traditionally told by men, as it often includes unique challenges and perspectives shaped by gender-specific experiences. Yet when women speak about their journeys, their stories often reveal the power of persistence and hope, highlighting the unique challenges they face and the resilience they demonstrate in overcoming societal barriers.

Unfortunately, society still nurtures harmful stereotypes about women. In my school years, teachers sometimes praised boys openly, suggesting that they were naturally better at studies. Girls were rarely celebrated in the same way. Even today, it is common to hear remarks that boys are more capable or that girls are prone to gossip and distraction.

These assumptions reflect a deeply ingrained bias that shapes how children see themselves and each other. Gender inequality is not always loud or visible; often it is embedded quietly in everyday attitudes, expectations, and classroom practices and cultures.

True gender equality means far more than symbolic celebration. As writer P. S. Niranjana recently noted in a discussion of gender equality in schools, it refers to a society where people of all genders enjoy equal rights, opportunities and protections across economic, political and social spheres. Equality must extend to access to education, healthcare, decision-making and dignity.

But equality cannot be achieved only through policy documents or academic discussions. It must be taught and practiced at home, in schools, and in every institution.

Too often, girls are told to change their behaviour to remain safe – to dress differently, to limit their movements or to avoid public spaces. Instead of placing the burden of safety on women, society must teach boys and men to respect women’s dignity, worth and goodness.

My upbringing reflected some of these contradictions and complexities. When I first studied in a co-educational school during grades nine and ten, I was warned not to talk to boys for fear that I might fall in love with males. I had already been conditioned to believe that attraction to the opposite gender would destroy my identity as a “good girl”. Out of fear and confusion, I avoided speaking to boys altogether.

Ironically, later in life, some of the most important lessons about courage and self-confidence came from working alongside supportive male colleagues. They encouraged me to defend my rights and reminded me of my worth.

Their support taught me an important truth: the struggle for gender equality is not a battle between men and women. It is a collective effort to build a society where dignity and opportunity are shared equally, working together for the common good.

On this International Women’s Day, I celebrate the courage of women who continue to persist despite obstacles, rejection and doubt. Our stories may not always be dramatic or widely recognized, but they carry the quiet strength of survival, optimism and resilience.

And sometimes, understanding women’s worth is itself the greatest achievement of all.

Dr Robancy A. Helen is a sister of the Messengers of Mary of Magnificat based in Tamil Nadu. She worked as a programme coordinator for the Catholic Bishops’ Conference of India’s Office for Scheduled Castes and Backward Classes, focusing on Dalit Christian women and women’s rights.